Turning 50? Should it be a Rite of Passage?

June 29, 2015 by the sibyls 4 Comments

by Kerry Cue

Listening to some wonderful stories while attending a Celebrants’ Conference in Sydney the other week, I was flabbergasted to discover there was such a thing as a Croning Ceremony. I was delighted to meet Jacqueline Hope, a Celebrant from WA, who has conducted such a ceremony. See here and here.

Who would want to be called a crone? No one. Yet there are two conflicting meanings of this word: (Free Dictionary)

An old woman considered to be ugly; a hag.
A woman who is venerated for experience, judgment, and wisdom.

Can we reclaim the word crone as a positive force? I doubt it, but many women today treat their 50^th birthday as a rite of Passage. This is a New Age take on the pagan/Wicca belief that there are three stages of womanhood: Virgin, Mother, Crone. Of course, others might consider their 60th birthday as their entry into their wise years. Or, perhaps, your 70th birthday has special meaning for you.

The Fabulous Stage is represented by Beatrix Ost, Advanced Style, NY.

The respected mythologist Jospeh Campbell referred to crones appearing to help the child of destiny in a time of danger and obscurity.

Others call this ritual a Wise Woman Ceremony, either way it is claiming the mature years as a positive stage. From Barbara Hannah Grufferman in The Huffingtonpost to The Women at Woodstock, who run weekends for women over 50, women are gathering together to celebrate the joy and wisdom of this their ‘FABULOUS’ stage.

Photo source: Unsourced.

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If you learn how to die, you’ll learn how to live

April 29, 2015 by the sibyls Leave a Comment

BEING MORTAL: Medicine and What Matters in the End

By Atul Gawande

Metropolitan Books/Henry Holt & Company, 2014.

Review by Kerry Cue

Atul Gawande

The reason this book is so meaningful, so compelling and why it ranks as a rare must-read is because, in telling the story of how to die a good death, it slowly addresses an equally important question namely ‘how are we to live a good and meaningful life?’

Atul Gawande, surgeon and writer for The New Yorker, dreams of new ways of caring for the frail and old. He questions the bureaucratic nature of aged care institutions where the elderly are kept ‘safe’, but hardly ‘alive’. And he rails against the invasive, painful and ultimately futile medical procedures inflicted on the dying. Yet this book is no dry academic tome. Gawande tells the storxy of dying and death of his father, also a surgeon, from first discovering the tumor in the spinal column, through the family’s struggling with medical options – operate? His father might become a quadriplegic. Don’t operate, he may become a quadriplegic! – to his father’s final days.

There is one strong and clear message from this thoughtful exploration of the end stage. Patients could have good days even when dying. But to achieve this goal they must be asked, or think about, at least, ‘what are your greatest fears?’ and ‘what are your current goals?’ Simple questions but from the answers patients discover how they are to live in their final days and, eventually, die.

Gawande has managed to take the fear away from our modern, Western view of dying, which, in many aspects involves, an impersonal, sterile, ICU bed intubated with a tube down the throat and a total loss of control. Dying need not be like this. Gawande shows how the human spirit can flourish and life can be fully lived to the very end.

Photo source: Unsourced book review blog, Tapestry held in the Victoria and Albert Museum, London.

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Vote 1 Wisdom ….. or How not to be a victim by Hillary Clinton

April 21, 2015 by the sibyls Leave a Comment

by Kerry Cue

Hillary Clinton is 67 years old and running for President. If she is voted into office, an increasingly unlikely scenario, she will be 70 years old and, after 2 possible terms, she will be 78 years old.

Why all the brouhaha? Opponents have dubbed Hillary ‘grandma’, which, indeed, she is, but the term is used as an insult. It is meant to demean her status.

There have been 44 presidents with 3 in Hillary’s demographic. Margaret Thatcher was 54 when she became Prime Minister in 1979 and held that office for 11 years. Golda Meir was 71 when elected Prime Minister of Israel in 1969. Angela Merkel was 51 when elected German Chancellor. She remains in office at the age of 61.

There are now 46 million Americans over 65 and the numbers are rising. Last election they represented 23% of the voting population. Only a fool would set out to insult 23% of potential voters. Then again, fools rush in where the older and wiser fear to tread.

Hillary had the last say. She started a Twitter account #Grandmotherknowsbest.

Thus ends the lesson in how not to be a victim.

Photosource: Winedentity

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Beyond Gen Y Fads Cool & Classy

March 26, 2015 by the sibyls Leave a Comment

by Kerry Cue

You can find more information about Her Magnificence (above) here along with more fab fashion at WOMAD, Adelaide, here and our very special Chemo Fashionista, Jules, here. Meanwhile, here are some more Cool & Classy fashionistas at WOMAD.

Mother and Daughter with the WOW Factor.

Dazzling African Print

Spot on style.

The Fabulous Hazel

Officialish & Classy too

Chemo Fashionista

March 23, 2015 by the sibyls 8 Comments

by Kerry Cue

This is the Funky and Fabulous Jules at WOMAD 2015. She caught my attention because she radiated such a positive vibe. But she had a story to tell. Jules started a Chemo regime of treatment every two weeks – 6 months ago. She was heading back into ‘the chair’ the day after this photograph was taken. She is an example to us all. Grab life now. Celebrate now. Non of us know the future.

We, The Sibyls, thank Jules for sharing her positively contagious spirit and wish her a speedy recovery.

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Beyond Y Gen Fads: Funky & Fabulous

March 20, 2015 by the sibyls 1 Comment

by Kerry Cue

I’ve just been to WOMAD 2015 in Adelaide. The spanish pair, Osadia (Left in action) enthralled the crowd with their hair art. One could only pay homage to the Her Magnificence (Pictured above), sporting one of Osadia’s many magisterial creations at the Festival. Osadia made me think that we are all rather dull with our own creative coiffures. Meanwhile, I wandered around the crowd asking fellow festival goers if I could take their photos for a Festival Vibe post on Sibylesque. Here is the first (There will be two more in posts) of some of the Funky & Fab festival goers:

Are the Food Police killing us?

March 11, 2015 by the sibyls Leave a Comment

by Kerry Cue

Who are the Food Police? Epidemiologists. They juggle statistics and advise governments. They do good work with diseases. Where? Why? How?

But their diet advice is often iffy.

‘At best they can show only association, not causation. Epidemiological data can be used to suggest hypotheses but not to prove them.’

Nina Teicholz, The Government’s Bad Diet Advice, NYT, 20 FEB, 2015

So what are some of the backflips in Government dietary advice in recent years:

salt is not that bad
red meat is not that bad
fat is not that bad
and now, guess what, cholesterol is NOT THAT BAD.

See Why we eat ourselves crazy on this blog.

The US Dietary Guidelines Advisory Committee’s hysterical fear of fat in recent decades gave support to low-fat foods, which, because of their high-sugar content, may have significantly contributed to obesity and therefore other chronic diseases.

‘Over the past 50 years, we cut fat intake by 25 percent and increased carbohydrates by more than 30 percent, according to a new analysis of government data. Yet recent science has increasingly shown that a high-carb diet rich in sugar and refined grains increases the risk of obesity, diabetes and heart disease — much more so than a diet high in fat and cholesterol.’ Mark Bittman, How Should We Eat?, NYT, 25 FEB 2015.

Meanwhile, cholesterol has come in from the cold. All those eggs you didn’t eat and all those egg white omelets you did eat have not helped your cholesterol levels. The US Dietary Guidelines Advisory Committee has recommened that dietry cholesterol is not much of a problem. Mark Bittman, How Should We Eat?, NYT, 25 FEB 2015.

In other words, when dealing with the Food Police take their recommendations with a grain of salt, a lashing of cream, a scrambled egg and some leafy green vegetables (everyone thinks they’re a good idea).

Photo source: unsourced

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The Sibyls Salute: Merle Thornton and Ro Bogner

March 4, 2015 by the sibyls Leave a Comment

by Kerry Cue

Fifty years ago on 31 March 1965 Merle Thornton* and Rosalie Bogner chained themselves to the Regatta Hotel bar rail in a strategic and planned protest for women’s rights.

The protest was aimed at lifting the marriage bar whereby women were forced to resign from the public service when they married. Merle had not informed her employer, the ABC, of her marriage, but when she fell pregnant she was forced to resign.

Merle and Ro staged the protest in a hotel opposite the ABC buildings in Brisbane in time for the evening news. Their husbands handed out leaflets and both news reporters and the police turned up. Following the publicity that ‘the wives of two well know university lecturers’ had staged a protest, both Merle and Ro received death threats and abuse over the phone but also some support.

Questions asked in the Queensland parliament included: ‘Where were their children?’, ‘Should the children be put in care?’ and ‘Should their husbands be psychologically examined to see if they are fit to be academics?’

Merle and Ro went on to form The Equal Opportunities for Women Assoc, the first in Australia and possibly the world. Neither the unions nor the political parties were interested in lifting the Marriage Bar.

After much lobbying Bill Hayden, a member of this association and a federal member of parliament introduced a private members bill to lift the ban. An emergency Cabinet meeting was called, followed by an announcement that the ban would be lifted under a Commonwealth Act.

In August 1966, 18 months after Merle and Ro’s bar protest, the lifting of the marriage bar was signed into law along with the introduction of the first accouchement leave or (unpaid) Maternity leave.

We, the Sibyls, salute Merle Thornton and Ro Bogner for their strategic brilliance, gutsy determination and political nous. We also thank them for kick-starting the 2^nd Wave Feminist Agenda 50 years ago to the benefit of all Australian women.

*Merle is the mother of well-known actress Sigrid Thornton. In 2014, the Regatta Hotel named a bar after Merle Thornton.

More details:

TV interview Merle Thornton and Ro Bogner, ABC, aired 10 April, 1965.

The National Library of Australia

Photo Source: DYIDESPAIR Website

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The Sibyls’ Salon

March 2, 2015 by the sibyls Leave a Comment

Thanks to all our Sibyls who came along to our FEB SALON and Celia for the Sibyl Cake. As the Salons evolve we will invite public participation.

Sibyl Kerry and Sibyl Doris

Following our honest and lively discussions in a safe, non-judgement and non-competitive forum here are a few things we learned this time.

1. Food is a language for women. We communicate through food. Some do. The rest of us dial-a-pizza

2. A strong character can step out of the cover of a novel to teach you about life. If, however, your interest in the character involves shagging them on a cold and windy Scottish moor, you may not learn much.

3. You do not get to write your own eulogy, but if you start early … you never know.

We also raised some modest funds for Sue’s Global Community work in Nepal.